Relationships are like a mirror reflecting back the way we are. Through our interactions with others, we learn about ourselves. The feedback can be immediate and sometimes harsh, but if we are open, illuminating. When we learn to see relationships as a mirror, we clear the way to profound personal growth. No more blaming anyone else for our unhappiness or handing over responsibility for our behaviour. The buck stops where it belongs!

‘A loving person lives in a loving world. A hostile person lives in a hostile world. Everyone you meet is your mirror.’

Ken Keyes Junior

(Picasso, ‘Girl in a Mirror’)

Your relationship with yourself is the basis of your relationships with others

We do not see things as they are – we see them as we are. We project our attitudes, beliefs, perceptions and misperceptions onto others. For example, people who are critical of others are usually privately critical of themselves; loud and boastful people are often trying to hide their anxieties; and people afraid that others will get one over on them are often looking to get one over on others.

Similarly, if you’re think most people are selfish, it’s probably because you have selfish tendencies; if you believe others are unreliable, they’ll constantly let you down; and if you’re the jealous sort, your jealousies are likely to be driven by your own insecurities.

Your attitudes and beliefs say more about you than anyone else. As you grow in wisdom, you discover that it is not others behaviour but your responses that create your experience of life, so if your relationships need attention, go within. Examine the causes, seek heightened awareness, and make love, peace and compassion the basis of your daily existence.

©David Lawrence Preston, 7.12.2016

Follow me on Facebook and Twitter @David_L_Preston

How to Books, 2007